An international student asked. "Teacher, my friend said '됐어요'—does that mean she wants some or she doesn't want any?" Korean people rarely get confused by this phrase, so even I was stumped for a moment. ## In the Past, Declining Was Good Manners In the old days, if an elder offered you food and you immediately said, "Yes, please," you would look greedy. So you would first decline by saying, "No, no, 됐어요." The person offering would also ask two or three more times. Words that sound like a refusal sometimes actually meant "Please offer once more." ## These days, people speak clearly These days, many people ask only once and answer clearly with "yes" or "no." Even so, "됐어요" has stayed as it was. This expression comes from the meaning "It's done, it's enough." So it can mean "That's enough now (I'm good)" and also "I don't need it anymore (no thanks)." ## Here's how to tell them apart - If someone says it softly, "Ah, 됐어요~," it's a refusal meaning "It's okay, I appreciate the thought." - Said short and low, "됐어요." can sound like you're angry or telling them to stop. - After work is finished, "됐어요, 가도 돼요" ("It's done, you can go") is permission. It's a somewhat risky phrase for foreigners to use. To decline, say "I'm fine, thank you," and to accept, say "Yes, sounds good." If you're not sure what the other person means by "That's enough," smile and ask, "Then shall I not give you any?" Then ask one more time. Koreans don't find that question rude at all.